Top of the Food Chain

        One negative thing that the past leaves behind are entitlements. An idea of being worthy of a title or position without having to prove yourself. It has been said since the beginning of time that we, as humans, are the top of the food chain. If I'm going to be the best at something you better believe I'm going to prove it to my inferiors. Anyone can say they have royal blood but unless they have a crown on their head I will continue to refuse to pay taxes (and a burger king crown doesn't count Donovan). So to earn this title of ultimate predator here was my "crowning" achievement.

        For a long time I have wanted to make an evening out of consuming as many different kinds of animals as I could sticking to the main animal classes and then some. This mostly consisted of a visit to the restaurant 'Hush Puppies' with my dad which is well known for their southern style food. The list of animals included the following:

Mammal

       Steak. Simple, common, spectacular steak. Not too much I need to say about beef. Most everyone already knows how wonderful it is. I had a cut of sirloin sprinkled with bacon bits before getting into the fun stuff.





Reptile

        To represent the reptiles I had some deep fried alligator tail. 'What does a gator taste like' you ask? Hard to say. Alligator is the Jack in the Box of meat, it doesn't know what it wants to identify itself with. To me it's a balanced mix of red meat, chicken and fish all in one. Whatever it is I thoroughly enjoyed it. 






Fish

   
       Catfish is one of my favorite kinds of fish so it was an desirable addition to the cause. Its meat is white and the flavor isn't powerful so it is wonderful when breaded and fried. I don't care how ugly you are friend. It's what's on the inside that counts.








Crustacean

       The crustacean category was represented by traditional grilled shrimp. I'm not a huge fan of shrimp but we get along alright. I've always been more of a crab kind of guy. Still some good stuff, just not as good.... no offense.






Muscle

     Oysters are normally very tough and rubbery but much like anything else that is deep fried it was fun to eat. Reminded me of fried Calamari which I love. If the world truly is 'my oyster' make sure to deep fry it first. Two thumbs up.














Amphibian

     Along with the alligator tail frogs legs are unfortunately an under utilized meat that I find very tasty. It's like getting a double-decker chicken wing that tastes like a cross between chicken and scallops. I feel for you mr. frog and am empathetic to your lack of popularity.




Fowl

       Supposedly everything tastes like chicken so it would have been wrong not to include a chicken sandwich on the list. After eating many different things I can say not all of it tastes like chicken. I mean no offense and am not trying to hurt the chicken's pride but personally I found this to be false. In fact I'm the one that should be offended. I don't appreciate being lied to mr. chicken. Don't worry, that wont stop me from eating you.







Insect

     Most of what I ate was perfectly agreeable and the fear factor wasn't an issue. Being afraid of the idea of certain foods has never been a problem for me. I decided I should involve something a little outside my comfort zone so I found a bug sucker that had an insect trapped inside. It took a good hour to free it from it's melon flavored prison and when I got to it I was pleasantly surprised to find that it tasted similar to an almond.

       I am happy to say that I now feel like I legitimately belong in the 'top of the food chain' club. May all beasts fear my appetite.